Random Shit Friday

   The title says it all, folks. I'm just throwing some random shit on here to see what sticks. And we'll start with the worlds largest fast-food chain:

   Yup! Rotten Ronnies. Seems down State-side McD's is shrinking, even if the poor fuckers who eat their food aren't. Ron's is shuttering several restaurants, closing more than they open this year. A spokesperson says the closures will be "minimal". And while exact figures haven't been released, the chain plans on cutting 700 worldwide. And I gotta agree! Do we really need a Golden Arches every mile or so? Are people getting so fucking fat they can't even DRIVE the extra distance? O-kay. That was a stupid question. Of course they can't.
   Still with fast food: Seem Burger King's at it again in Japan. They came out with an all-black burger not long ago. Black bun, cheese and burger. Now, they're going Red. It's called the Aka Samurai Burger. Aka means 'red' in Japanese apparently. And, you guessed it, it's a red bun, red cheese and a tomato just because they can. It's supposed to be spicy. And if beef ain't your thing, the same concoction will be offered in chicken.

   Moving on: Donald Trump for President. Bwa-haw-haw-haw! It's sad, but true. The Donald has thrown his hat (and comb-over) into the race for the Republican nomination, and has tapped Oprah fucking Winfrey as VEEP. I'm glad I live in Canada! Oh, wait a sec. That's right! We've got Stephen Hitler..er..Harper..as Prime Minister. Speaking of politicians, yet another Canadian member of the unelected Senate is in deep shit. Not for dipping into the public purse, but for (allegedly) dipping into an underage 16 year old girl. Although she says there was no in-out till she was 18. Not that it matters.

   Moving on again: Pope Frankie is calling on world leaders to do something to protect the environment, and save our ruined planet. Frank says we must fix the "perverse economy". Sure thing Frankie, sure thing. By the way, when are YOU going to do something about the perverted priesthood and save those ruined by them?
   I'm waiting.
   'Nuff said

The "New" Top Gear? Not For Me

   Months after Top Gear host Jeremy Clarkson was shit-canned, the BBC has announced his 'replacement'. Chris Evans was featured on the show a few times, and is admittedly a car fanatic. But he doesn't have the charisma Clarkson had (despite his foibles), and I don't think he's got what it takes to be able to carry what was the world's most popular car show. And it was THE most popular motoring show "in the world", as Clarkson would put it. It was also the most popular BBC show, with 350 million viewers.
   But naming Evans as the new host is just one of the many problems the once storied franchise faces. Also gone are his side-kicks, James "Captain Slow" May and Richard "Hamster" Hammond. At least according to reports I've seen. Just who's been tapped to replace them has not yet been announced. But whoever the 'new crew' turn out to be, I, among millions of others, will NOT be watching when the show re-launches.
   The "why" is simple. After more than 20 years, the trio above built up a rapport between themselves, and with the audience. They also built up a trust, if you will, with viewers. That's something the new hosts will probably never be able to do.
   Don't get me wrong. Top Gear is far from being put in "park". There's still a lot of mileage left in the show. But without Clarkson, Hammond and May it may soon be running on empty.
   'Nuff said.

Oh Shit, They're Breeding Again

   Sad to report this, but Kim Lardasian is carrying another spawn of Kanye West. And, surprise, surprise, she made the announcement on the mid-season finale of their "reality" show. Ratings were that bad Kim? And what're you going to call this one? Her first brat is "North West". What're they gonna call this one. South? I just hope the 'mother ship' returns to take Kimye and the rest of that gang back to the planet Kardash.
   Speaking of the unspeakable family, I also see Bruce Jenner has picked a name for when he crosses over to become 'she': Caitlyn. At least he/she's spelling it with a "C", rather than a "K"..
   The only reason I know about this shit is from listening to one of my local radio stations. But also after hearing them drone on and on about this, I might just switch stations.
   'Nuff said.